Beer Viking

Refill my Whale, Please!!

By Marshall Ellingson

Whale season has come early this year. And I don’t mean the mammals!

I am a Ballena drinker. Ballena: The Beer of the Pacific. Ballena means whale in Spanish and is the name of the 940ml bottle of Pacifico Beer. Drinking Ballenas is like a whole different culture from drinking the regular 325ml bottles. Instead of bringing back the 20 bottle (or new 24 bottle) cases of beer to the store, I always have a few empty Ballena bottles in my car ready to be turned in for fresh Ballena. I often drink singles. At night I will wind down with one, maybe two Ballenas. It makes me feel very happy to return empty Ballenas and receive full ones. Paying for just the price of the beer and recycling the big bottles gives me great pleasure. It perturbs me when I can’t find an empty in the back seat of my car and have nothing to bring in for return. Unhappy, I am stuck paying the 6 peso deposit for the new bottle. I feel out of balance. Out of rhythm. Out of tune with the whale song.

A Ballena makes it’s own friends. Often there is another who willingly shares in the Ballena. Two can enjoy a Ballena on the four-lane from Cabo San Lucas to San Jose Del Cabo and just be finishing the last sip in time to pull into the little store by the MEGA to cash in for a fresh one. Ballenas are passed around on bumpy roads coming back from East Cape surf spots. Passing time at “The Mirador” in San Jose, sipping a Ballena with a significant other, watching the surf or listening to the Mexican’s crank their Banda music under the stars. Give the Coco guy a Ballena and he is my friend for life. Who wouldn’t want to be given cold Ballena?

“That’s good Ballena.” “That’s cold Ballena”. “That’s sweet Ballena”. Often, amongst friends, we talk of Ballena in the third person. Ballena experiences. As if Ballena exists on some level of being. On some higher vibration. When visiting Mazatlan last year I paid homage to the huge Pacifico vat fountain on the malecon.

Ballenas come in their own temperature and moisture-regulating package. The brown paper bag not only conceals the sinful behavior but also keeps the hands dry and the Ballena “bien fria”. People behind the counters at the corner beer stores always have an opener handy. Sometimes even limes. I speak to them in Spanish about Ballenas and they smile back in recognition. The Ballenas are floating in a huge electric cooler of ice and water. I plunge my arm into the refreshing frigid and grab cold Ballena. I recognize the lady at the counter and offer a “Como estas?”. I walk out into the sun and dusty desert heat taking a big sip of Ballena.

Let’s have a whale of a time.

Recently I went over to the other side. I became a “Caguamon”. Caguama, meaning turtle, is the Spanish name for the Ballena-sized bottles of Tecate beer. Someone who drinks Caguamas is a “Caguamon”. A short time ago, Tecate began a promotion of increasing the size of the Caguama by 27% without increasing the price. And believe me, it is an impressive sight. The Caguama towers, dwarfing the Ballena in the fridge at the beer store, instilling an inferiority complex into the Ballena drinker. Personally, I find the lines of the Tecate bottle to be too sharp, unfriendly compared to the soft roundness of the Ballena bottle. The color scheme of the Tecate bottle seems somewhat Nazi-esque as does the creepy black bird. The Ballena motif on the other hand leaves me feeling like a sailor out on the Sea of Cortez, enjoying a cold one with my feet up on the wooden rail of my sloop, smiling as a whale goes by spouting water out from its’ head then winking at me as it dips back in and waves its’ massive tail.

All that being said, 27% extra brew was enough to turn me away from my beloved Ballena.

The gulps of Caguama were satisfying, yet not the sweet taste of Ballena, and the bottle seemed too large and encumbering, hard to fit into the normal spots where I put my Ballena in my car as I cruise. I missed Ballena.

Fortunately, Pacifico has responded to the attack of the “Caguamon” with the “Rellena tu Ballena” promotion. That translates as refill your beer. Rellena, as in Chiles Rellenos. The game here is to collect the bottle caps from the Ballenas. Once I have 6 bottle caps I can turn in my empty Ballena bottle with the 6 caps and get a fresh, cold and tasty Ballena ABSOLUTELY FREE! Before the promotion I was already a happy participant in the Ballena drinking game. 15 pesos plus an empty Ballena bottle from my back seat gave me a cold 940mls of pure 4.5% Mexican brewed delight. Now I keep the bottle caps in my VW bug ashtray and am constantly surprised how quickly the collection gets up to 6, or 12. What joy going in with nothing buy a handful of bottle caps and an empty Ballena and coming out with cold fresh Ballena!? Though I must say, not all the stores are admitting to being involved in the promotion. One night I drove around to 6 stores until I finally found one in La Playita that would play along. Some told me I had to go to the warehouse out by the airport! You can refill your Whale until November 15^th. Long live the beer wars of Mexico!